To Be or To Ever Never Be?!

Back after a year long hiatus, I decide to be a regular much on this platform. though not daily but at least once a week. 4 blogs min per month, pukkawala promise.
    I do not intend to keep a diary, a virtual copy comes to my rescue when i often need it be. Something strange has been happening with me for quite a while now. I pretend to be living in a make-believe system that i have construed around myself which comes back to bite me when i'm in a retrospective mode vis-a-vis my alone time with me.
   One of my seniors from school, i re-connected with a while back and we have become almost besties. She  and I, have always been there for each other through happier and trying times. Today, she got proposed. does that mean our single days of messy freedom and fun times are over? i should not be assuming n over-thinking, but the usual me has acted up. After having cried over a barrage of slow sad numbers, i decided to pour my heart out. Sadly, i have no one to speak all this much with. The one who i could with, is in d couples in-accessible section now.
  I never really hang out with friends who cannot strike a balance between their friends and their love-lives. A sad state, but a stark reality. But this is a first timer situation for me....I hope i find a cope-worthy solution to this soon. Till then I decide to not super cede the real and jump to inconclusive baseless conclusions.
  I am very happy that she has been able to connect with the guy, with whom it has been an almost struggle of sorts for her for a year. Maybe, i tot i shall also be in a better situation whenever she would be. There i go again, assumptions and me. or is it the fact that i feel, i shall stay alone and lonely till the end, and if she can why can not me? isn't that being selfish, when for my closest friend i should be selfless....i'm worried i may never be able to find a solution of this emotional turmoil in my head....slap a smile and pretend will be my modus operandi till then....y do one's self feelings overcome your genuine happiness for your dear one....omg....a solution soon....my head will crack open soon anytime....so is shall, doze myself back to some rest and hopefully no weird dreams.....cheers, world......xoxo

being together yet apart.....and some are better left a fart-apart!!!

ab aap yeh soch rahe honge ki yeh wahi purane thakke hue kisi love story ya past love ke baare main baat karegi. But i refrain. Why should a title decide what you mean to write in d blog thereafter....yes, i do intend to pour light over an issue, but love is'nt always d answer to everything....i decide to pen about friends.....who matter and are always there...and d buggers who are namesakes and wish they never happened.....But life is an expereince, an amalgamation of experiences....everything's worth a try.....what goes and comes back was always worth it....but that which does'nt, was never meant to be yours in the first place.....these empty benches ready to be explored, sat upon, gossiped away at, time well spent, new people met, old ones sought and so on....kehte hai jaha pyaar hota hai, waha thoda jhagda, samjhana, uljhna chalta hai....isse pyaar aur rishton ki gehraiyaan badhti hai...lekin today's time, d world seems to have taken a new meaning out of this saying....der ultimate conclusion is to use and throw ppl around as per their benefits....real friendships, sadly cease to exist.....But who says miraculous things do not happen....in this world of unrealistic, fake people....some truth presides and i hope it triumphs and changes the face of this slowly turning vicious and almost cruel world....Hope better sense prevails...till then hope for catching unto amazing and long lasting people and keeping the unruly, unwanted relations at bay....KEEP A WATCH OUT!!!.....EYES WIDE OPEN!!!....TILL then cheers and keep no fears and inhibitions.....mwaahs <^_^>

Train Rain and Pain....

Since I started having lectures in St. Xavier's, I decided to travel on certain days by the Central line. Those days would be the late lectures, exams or days when I wished to get in late. You skip the crowds,you get a seat...what more could you ask for. I would give my fast trains of everyday a happy miss in exchange to this blissful travel. But certain things come at a cost. And the cost here begins 4m d conditions of the train itself. Most of the times, the fans refuse to work...and if your lucky one amongst d the lucky two will be functioning. You feel the need like I feel today as I travel by this very train. Phew!!! Sweaty me even before my clg day begins...And the need is especially felt when one does'nt get a window seat in the direction the train moves!!! Nakhre hai naatak re...But I feel its hardly a price to pay dude...But thenthere are hardly 2 rows of seats, so getting a seat is a bigger task...Smart me knows that trains start 4m andheri to cst...so I prefer dose trains...at times u miss 'em...then take a panvel and change trains...I find dem a lil too much to do in da mrng...and dey are a lil dirty too...:P...aur aaj to add to the mess the last min rains ka jhonka...so annoying I tell you...opening your umbrella's 4 a while and then carry around that wet drippy umbrella to clg...not kewl...duhuh...but an overall a slow, long endurable journey...then compared to the stressed, killer, fast trains on d western line....aakhir train to train hi hai...mumbai ki jaan...mumbai ki shaan...mumbai ka maan...;D

Love, Cockroaches and the Beginning.....

I would love to hate to make this an everyday habit….but now as I have d time and think its outta be efficiently used for once. So  4m 2day i.e. the 29^th of  March 2011, everyday (wheneva it is possible 4 me, trying almost every day…)….I shall be blogging about each day of my vacations…well for starters, I have exciting trips and events planned up for the near future….am way too excited….had an equally boring vacation last year same time….am glad dis year won’t be a drab…..my days in Bombay are quite similar to the previous…..and to avoid having monotonous blog entries…I might just have interesting topics at hand being discussed…debated…fought over….tugged at….mulled over and so on….I do not expect any followers….nor do I write for an audience…..I write what I feel….will try and be unbiased about certain topics…but I ain’t promising or guaranteeing nething…..as I write I listen to E.T. by Katy Perry feat kanye west…..naice music…but definitely nuin alien about it……

                                             Okay so I hafta discuss a few things about me…..and they are related to what happened to me in the day…isliye here I go….. firstly I’m scared like shitting-in-my-pants-type  of insects….dey creep me out….and am not brave enough to face them alone…so during my driving lesson today I had an adult cockroach (….eeee gives me d creeps still)….on my neck……I just left d car…dint even stop it….paranoia at its best…….my instructor is officially scared of me now…thinks I’m loco at my best!!!

Secondly, Love I guess isn’t meant for me…..I can’t differentiate between true love and just for the sake of it type….i’m  doing the same mistake that I complained others of committing before….generalizing….men when they want anything they will  end the rules but will have it get it…they are such smooth talkers that they can convince you to maybe rob a bank o steal jewels for them types…lol….now that’s exaggerated a lil bit too much…but it’s almost true to deny and its becoming very difficult to see whether its genuine or just need it at that moment kind of love….I very strongly feel that needs to be a history of friendship to actually know d person well enough to fall in love….sadly love has come to this point in our lives….falling in love at first sight is a major mistake, coz the aspects like trust, genuinity and compatibility are in rarity…..past does add to your misery which I feel god deprived quality amongst d female species of humans….we hold unto grudges and can never let go off past very easily and quickly….experiences make man dread  fire….but is every fire avoidable and should it be because of one bad fire experience….cheers catch ya’ll 2mrw!!!